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Are you chubby, gay, and need a walking partner?
Okay, so here's what happened: I have very recently reached critical mass, and am on the brink of becoming even more embarrassed by my ever-widening ass. I'd love to walk around the lake a bit, maybe in the mornings before the fire starts shooting from the sky, and I'd love to do it with a chubby, gay guy who has an ass that seems to be spreading, too. It has been waaaaay too long since I lived in San Francisco, waaaaaay too long since I had the friend I'm looking for now. I swear I'm not crazy. I'm married with a kid (and, okay, a boyfriend, so maybe I'm just slightly left of normal) and I want to walk with someone I like. If you don't find this utterly offensive or stupid, let's chat! You know, while we're walking around the lake... and I don't care how old you are, although if you're really, REALLY , I'll feel really, REALLY old. |
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I'm the upholsterer who came to you house to give you an estimate. You answered the door under-dressed but you never went to cover yourself. You were wearing a tiny t-shirt with obviously no bra and some tiny bikini-like underwear. You kept bending over in front of me, I think on purpose. I'm pretty sure you did this on purpose to tease me and I wanted to make a move on you but was too nervous to cross that line. I hope I'm right. If so, please respond. I'd love to come by and give you another "free estimate".
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Hope to Hear from you soon.
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